I have been doing a yearly review as part of my personal self-reflection practice for years.
In the past, I made use of a predefined list of question and answer from various sources. But this year I have decided to make the leap and considered using bit and pieces of what I have learned over the years and combine them here.
The Cambridge Dictionary defines self-reflection as an “activity of thinking about your own feelings and behaviour, and the reasons that may lie behind them.”
I love that the definition includes thinking about the reasons behind our feelings and behaviours. Wisdom is knowing and understanding why we feel and behave the way we do and making the needed adjustments to do better.
Here are some of the questions I’m asking myself this year:
1. What was good about 2017?
2. What was the worst thing about 2017?
The waiting! I have had to wait for divorce proceedings, the right work opportunity and our house. Thankfully (and hopefully) the waiting is teaching me to be patient or at very least embrace the waiting seasons!
3. What did you learn about yourself this year?
My own self-worth! I started standing up for what I believe I am worth.
Also, I learned that I prefer cleaning of tidying up!
4. Did you get out of your comfort zone? In what way?
The Brave + Broken Lifestyle Challenge is all about getting out of your comfort zone, nurturing yourself and changing destructive habits holding you back.
In September I built up the courage to wear short shorts on one of our outings to the dam! It became a routine and then filtered through to other areas of my life. Furthermore, it brought acceptance and determination to change. (More on this later!)
5. Did you overcome any fears? How and which ones?
Yes, I did, even though I believe we overcome fears in layers!
Being in a relationship, where I am accepted has helped me overcome certain fears. In the beginning, it was extremely difficult to be open and honest about what I am feeling and or my fears. In being vulnerable, I allowed myself to be bare in front of another human being, it took an incredible amount of courage that has paid off!
I suppose this is exactly what a marriage is, but it wasn’t something I could do or be in my marriage.
6. What were your coping mechanisms in 2017?
Food but more specifically, carbs and chocolate! I have spoken about my food addiction before – there is nothing pretty about it! Thankfully, I am recognising the triggers and even if I am not fully capable of making wise decisions when I am down in the dumps, yet!
7. For which major goal did you lay the foundation?
My yet, at the end of the previous answer, should make it clear, that I am working with a strategy. Recognising triggers is the foundation for altering behaviour! It is something that I have been working on this year like I mentioned above, I haven’t always been successful, but, by being conscious of my mood, I have been able to adapt and intervene!
8. In which areas of life did you show up boldly?
I believe I have shown up boldly in the workplace, I have had a couple of interviews this year that have gone really well! Unfortunately, none of them was the right opportunity. (The waiting!)
Somehow, I believe being bold, searching and keeping the faith, is key to finding the right opportunity! I know my God, He is a good God and His timing never fails!
9. Did your word of the year have any value? In what way?
I started 2017 with the word generosity, the Afrikaans word for generosity is ‘vrygewigheid’. Towards, the middle of the year, I started doubting the word or the play on the word ‘vrygewig’ and the word ‘vrymoedig’.
Vrymoediheid loosely translates to ‘bold confidence’. Looking back over the year, vrymoedigheid hold an enormous value. Even if generosity is what I keep striving for!
10. What are you most grateful for this year?
I am so grateful for my boys and the growth that they have experienced this year! Grade 4 is no joke and Logan aced it, even when he was dealing with way too many emotional issues in between. The same with Oliver, Oliver’s rejection nearly broke me and yet, here we are a six months later and I can see the difference in the person he is.
The Fun Part of Self-Reflections – Taking it even deeper than I have before!
By sharing my self-reflection on the blog, I am kind of limiting myself. I’m sharing what it appropriate, leaving out details that are important to me, while being a little vague for anyone who doesn’t know me personally!
This year, I have created a free self-reflection guide. It includes all the questions I have included in this post and more!
Today’s post was part one (okay, really part 1A) of a three-part guide. The second part of the guide will be available in next week, with the last to follow soon after.
Part 1 of the guide will help you reflect on 2017! I hope it brings you joy, gratitude and appreciation for the things that worked well during 2017!
Part 2 is designed to help you choose a goal for 2018, as well as a word for the year, applicable focus areas and way to stay active and accountable for that goal!
Part 3 is really where the work begins! The aim in part 3 is to plan the steps that you will need to follow throughout the year, in order to succeed at your goal.