I haven’t referred to you as my husband in 4 years, however, today seems appropriate, simply because it is the day of our divorce.
On 16 June 2011, we were married. To be honest, I cannot even remember the exact time we said the ‘I do’s.’
The day of our Divorce
Eight years, five months and 17 days later, the day of our divorce (finally) arrived. It gives me so much pleasure to say, that as of today 03 December 2019 at 12:14, I am no longer married to you.
I kind of expected you to be there.
Mostly because I was hoping for you to see the delight on my face when the judge confirmed the divorce.
You’ll be happy to hear, my voice was a little shaky as I stated my name for the record, however, seconds thereafter I calmed down and thoroughly enjoyed the moment. I enjoyed every, yes, followed by ‘that’s correct’. Most of all, I enjoyed the little giggle I uttered in silence when the advocate confirmed the current child maintenance contribution of R1.00 per month.
It was over pretty quickly. Isn’t it always the very long wait followed by a quick couple of words. There was more time and more money involved in obtaining the divorce when compared to getting married.
And yet, there were fewer words.
Even though I didn’t manage to say, “If it pleases the court,” I did manage a quick “Thank you, my lord” as I left the stand!
The Lies Over the Years
You’ve told so many lies in the 10 years that I have known you. It’s refreshing to highlight where you were truthful! I will start with the most honest thing you’ve said. Naturally, I am paraphrasing, however, I am sure you’ll remember the just of the conversation:
“This divorce will not be easy, in actual fact, I am going to make your life hell.”
I wouldn’t go as far as to call it hell!
Apart from that one time in last year, when you tried to convince the family advocate I am a bad mom. It’s funny, the whole paper trail from the Rule 43 application was with the judge today. His only comment was: “It’s about time. I’m glad this divorce can finally be resolved.”
Apart from that one interesting decision you made, when you tried to obtain sole residence over Oli. It wasn’t hell, it was simply irritating; infuriating and a royal waste of my time.
Thankfully you don’t get to decide!
As I was getting ready for the day of our divorce this morning, I was a little nervous. The legal system in South Africa has let me down in the past, as you well know.
Thankfully, there’s a God that restores what was broken, that heals and returns two-fold what was lost. His Word echoed in my ears I was getting dressed:
“Return to Me, oh prisoners of hope, today I am declaring that I will restore double that was lost.”Zech 9:12
I hold on to His promises!
Finally, I am so happy to finally announce, that I am no longer bound to you in any legal capacity. I will acknowledge and respect you as Oliver’s father, but that is where it ends.
I wrote these words on Tuesday 3 December, after my day in court. Exhaustion and relief flooded over me.